Monday, August 3, 2009

Aug 3

Peak flow: 300

Breakfast, one bowl of fruit, peaches, grapes and strawberries. one cup of green tea(summer is wonderful)
Lunch light salad planned
Dinner, the pork strips and mixed veggies.

Do you remember those old Stuart Smalley skits from Saturday night Live? If not, here's a clip from Franken's film, "Stuart Saves His Family." During Smalley's affirmations he'd always have a meltdown. And this clip is no different.

I learned after spending time in OA that it didn't help. And why it didn't work for me was because OA kept me focused on why I ate so much instead of focusing on letting go of those feelings and moving on. Over three years, I didn't lose one ounce of weight. Instead the cravings were worse than ever.

Lama Jigme told me when I first started practicing with him that affirmations don't work. I listened--but I was convinced that OA was not about affirmations, it was about getting healthy emotionally and physically. Little did I realize that the only thing I did was get addicted to the program. When my husband and son pointed out to me that it wasn't working, and when Lama gently pointed out again and again taht affirmations don't work...I came to realized that something was wrong.

What was wrong was the way I was looking at my health. (And I wasn't paying attention to my Lama) Yes, I had an eating disorder when I was young. Yes Iwas terrified it'd come back. Yes, I thought that I had to get on the OA chat and use everyone there as an emotional vomitorium in order to be free of the compulsions I had acquired over the decades.

Then one morning in chat, one person had a complete meltdown a 'la Stuart Smalley. She gorged herself on a gallon of ice cream because her son missed the bus.
And all I could think about was why don't you just drive him to school?

Stuart Smalley for all the humor, is NOT a caring nurturer. He's a psychic vampire par excellance. And all the affirmations in the world will not make your weight go away.

Why? because your mind knows when it's being lied to. What works--and what Lama Jigme told me ages ago but was too hard headed to listen--is that contemplative questions work. How? Because the questions don't try and fool your conscious mind. They don't try to change the programming. What they do is get down into the subconscious mind...down deep in the mental basement where all the machinery is...and make adjustments there. Your higher mind does not have to answer the questions; instead it lets your subconscious mind explore possiblities.

It works. I know it works. I've got the results to prove it. Since March I've lost more weight using Lama's methods of contemplative notation and doing the Paleo diet than I ever did with OA, Weight Watchers, Susan Powters or anyone else.

Its the results that matter. And I'm getting them. And I couldn't be happier.
om mani padme hum.

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